Knucklehead?

With the project I have been working on for more than a year, fast moving forward, I am soon going to be living my dream to see everything I have drawn up in paper become a reality.

It has been a hard uphill climb since day one but an exciting and very fruitful experience indeed. In the course of working towards making this a reality, I have come to know better who my friends are and who are not worth my time. There were those who gave commitments but did not make good with their promise.

But that's all water under the bridge. All that matters to me now is to see people coming in and liking my food so we can hit our targets and turn this into a viable business venture that will grow and provide employment to people and enable me and my partners to share the fruits of our labor with the people that we love.

Not bad for a bunch of knuckleheads ...........

Magical Moments

Some time in the early 2000's, I joined a ride to a beach north of Manila. There was one night where we gathered in a room and jammed using a guitar and bongos. It was so much fun I ended up getting carried away doing a solo on vocals and bongos that turned into a rap of sorts that we all agreed was a magical moment we failed to record on video but will be forever remembered.

Another magical moment was at the start of this year where I played at a friend's birthday party. At the onset, I was just going through the motions. But as the night went on, the playing became so intense everyone enjoyed it till it lasted until 4 in the morning.

Same thing happened. No one remembered to record it on video, and it just remained a memory. One great jam.

Last Friday, I had the honor and pleasure to be joined by two of the country's best musicians. We did 2 long unrehearsed impromptu sets that we, and everyone in the house enjoyed, my wife and family included.

Before the set, I was scared shitless. The last time I sat on a drum kit was almost a year ago which by the way was another magical moment. this time caught on camera, posted on youtube.com

There was no rehearsal, no line up, no plans of what we were to do. There were a few adjustments here and there and admittedly some funny mistakes that went barely noticed. Overall I was happy and I consider this one of those magical moments.

To sum it all up, it was a great way to kick off the Father's Day weekend. A great weekend I shall always remember for the rest of my life. Till the next one.

A Friend In Need

Two strikes for me in discovering the true colors of a person. Fine weathered and in need are two of the best words to describe them.

Just last week I received an unexpected call from a dear friend. There were the usual hi's and how are you's but after I did my talking, the true purpose of the call came out.

He needed advice about something important that gave me the feeling I've been used again. Fine by me for as long as you call and get straight to the point. Not beating around the bush to give the impression you care.

This morning, I had another taste of that familiar feeling. Although I do have an obligation to settle, I felt the guy was pushing me more to get what he wanted aside of course from my obligation that needed to be settled.

Well, I guess that's life. You get sand kicked at your face at times when you are at your lowest and you can't do anything but find a way to solve it. In the meantime you keep your chin up and go though the motions as the world does not stop turning.

I just find consolation in coming home to my family. Seeing them in good health, swapping stories, laughing, and breaking bread while the world keeps turning and we all turn with it.

Silver

I remember the list of anniversaries starting with "paper" for the first year and so on and so forth. But people remember the longer ones well....silver, gold, diamond.

Silver for 25 years. In my case, add another 7.5 years so that totals 32.5 years.\

Looking back, it certainly is a looooong time when you think about it. Reclusion Perpetua or a life sentence starts around 25 years. So in short, my wife and I have served our life sentences plus 7.5 years.

When I think about it, it really doesn't feel like 25 years and I look forward to another 25. Hopefully our kids are stable by then and so are we. So we can enjoy each other's company more and see the world.

Meantime, all we can do is dream as dreams are free and we are cheap. Cheap but happy.

As I write, I remember 25 years ago we were still at the reception venue with over a hundred people that we wanted to leave so we could be alone.

Nowadays it is a luxury to be alone but we always find time whatever the situation may be.

There were many plans for a big celebration, travel, etc. Sad to say, they never pushed through....as usual.

But like I said before. We never stop dreaming. We never stop moving forward no matter how difficult the odds may be.

Come to think of it, all I want is some time alone with my best friend for 32.5 years. I know you deserve more and we are both working hard for it.

But in the meantime, let's just continue dreaming, loving, caring, laughing as we have been since the day we met.

And I thank you for all the years you have stood by me and our children.

Today it is silver and I look forward to gold

When Shit Hits the Fan

Sa pagdaan ng panahon unti unti kong nakikita ang tunay nilang kulay

Ang kulay ng bulok. Masakit sa mata, nalalasahan sa pagtingin, naaamoy sa malayo, nakakasuka

Sa iyong paglipad, tila napakataas ng iyong mararating

Ngunit habang pinagmamasdan kita, hindi ka Masaya

Sa halip, kalungkutan ang aking nakikita sa likod ng iyong mga ngiti

Galit sa bawat mong tawa

Hindi nakukuha sa ganyan yan

Maaring mabili mo ang ilan pero hindi ang lahat

Ang palasyo mo bagamat malaki at malawak ay inaamag

Walang tao, walang buhay, walang pag ibig

Crawling Out of a Hole

Now I know how it feels like when you try to crawl out of a hole. You get sucked in deep, and it gets darker and darker. The darker it gets, the light from above gets brighter and brighter.

Everyone looks down on you and watches you try to crawl out. What I learned is no one will go out of their way to pull you out except a few friends. Some will even commit to call you, but you find yourself hanging and waiting for nothing.

It is demeaning, depressing, and tiring to say the least. With people belonging to the root of the problem, leaving you desperate to solve the problem on your own.

It was a hard lesson learned and learn I did. Now it's time to work harder to find a way out of it for good I hope. So I can give more to the ones I love and make sure they do not experience the same painful thing.

But my chin is still up and will always be up as I keep trying until I achieve the freedom I have been longing for, no matter what it takes.

In the end, the good part of this exercise is that there is a limit to everything. Once you cross that line and there are no options left, you are damned for life.

Music

"Where words fail, music speaks" so goes a quote that I found while surfing the net. Music has been my savior of sorts as I and my family go through a major crisis in our lives. Funny thing about it is everyone is happy at home and it seems there is no crisis at all.

However, the weary need to rest. I have not had a vacation in a long time and have been silent and out of the loop in my circle of friends.

I am tired, impatient, and frustrated over the waiting game I again have to play as the year of the dragon starts.

As they say, time is gold and I have always tried to buy time at a very expensive cost.

Well, there is nothing more I can do but wait. Meantime, I hold my chin up and do what needs to be done to survive. As I always say, this will be over soon.